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    Conflict Resolution

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    • Conflict resolution is a process of working backwards before you can move forward. You must first acknowledge the internal voices before the external ones can make sense. Internally, some people perceive the clash of ideas to be what the conflict is about. Others are fixed upon the bad feelings as the problem.
    • External conflict usually happens because one or both parties aren’t voicing all the languages that are internally speaking. Hidden agendas create internal conflicts that manifest as external ones. Even though you might win a fight while hiding some part of you, you won’t be able to come together in a resolution.
    • Resolution is about creating a third picture so both parties work together, not just take turns as is done in compromise. Discover how to find “common ground” by panning back to a larger and larger perspective until you find one big enough to encompass what is important for both people.
    • Arguing, whether it is happening internally or externally, means one language is not being heard. To move from conflict to resolution, there has to be an interpreter who understands all 4 internal languages. It can be you, them, or a mediator.
    • If your external conflict appears to be resolved but your internal conflict isn’t, you will soon find yourself in a conflict around another issue with someone else. Resolution is about partnership, not compromise. Both parties must become partners in unraveling the language barrier causing internal conflict.

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